The Fourteenth Week

This week I returned to work, and it was not easy.  Sunday was filled with lots of tears and little sleep, but I am happy to report that Aidan and I made it through the week.  I think Aidan dealt with the seperartion better than I did, which makes me happy because what makes me sad is that I am not there to soothe him when he needs me most.  The first day, I came home, Aidan was exhausted and needed a nap.  So I curled up on the couch and held for as long as he would let me.  It warmed my heart to know that he needed me so much.  And as I stated in my letter, we gave Aidan bath's every day, and I nursed him to sleep.  Tears were less as the nights went on, and I was able to sleep more peacefully.  Thankfully, the work week was four short days followed by four days off.

Aidan rolled over for the first time this week.  My memaw was working with Aidan a lot this week on tummy time and how to roll over - it seems her work has paid off...somewhat.  Aidan rolled to his side by himself, then I held a singing penguin over his head (that has red flashing lights) and he rolled over to look at it. So rolling over wasn't one fluid motion, but it's definitely a start.  Memaw and I were excited.  Aidan also received his Christmas present early from my parents - a jumparoo.  We tested it out at Buy Buy Baby, and he fit just fine and seemed to love it.  Well, at home, his feet could not touch the ground, so we had to put a book under him, but he seemed to greatly enjoy it!  Hopefully, he will start to get the hang of it soon, and I'll share some more videos.

All About Mom

Overall, I think the work week got better as the days went on, and I found my routine.  I did not go to the gym until Friday, which was my day off.  I rushed home every day to Aidan, even if it was to hold him for a nap.

Each day, I was able to set my alarm a little later or hit an extra snooze.  I quickly realized I was giving myself too much time to get ready in the morning.  I was at the carpool meet up spot 15 minutes early or more!  Better to have too much time, than too little.  It's weird (TMI to follow...), in the morning, I understand how a cow feels.  I wear this hands free bra, hook up the breastpump, and brush my teeth/wash my face, all while producing milk for Aidan.  (Little crude, but please, find the humor!) Then at work, I feel like a sperm donor...you know, I go into a practically bare office, put up a “Do Not Distrub” sign, look at pictures (of Aidan) to help stimulate myself, get half naked, wait for the white stuff to be collected in a bottle, examine my results and pat myself on the back for the good work, clean myself up, get dressed, then leave the room discreetly. 

I also plays Words with Friends or check out the updates on Facebook while I pump at work.  It's a nice break, and I definitely need something to occupy my time, even if it's only ten minutes.

I have had time to reflect the past three months.  I use to be a very modest person, but when it comes to breastfeeding, it seems I do what's best for Aidan.  I have nursed in public several times and I nurse in front of friends and family, as long as they are comfortable with it...I know, who cares whether they are or not...well, I do.  I can easily go into another room to feed Aidan, so it's no big deal. It's amazing how much a baby changes your prespective...or modesty.  Though, I still change in a changing room at the gym - that will never change. :)